My Daughter the Comedian, Part III

The scene: Trader Joe's. Ruth is the in cart, being pushed by Daniel as we look for polenta. We pass some tall bottles of olive oil.

RUTH: That's wine!
MELISSA: No, that's -
RUTH (cutting Melissa off, loudly): You need some wine, Mommy? You like wine. You need buy some wine.
LADY STANDING NEXT TO US: ::Snicker::

My Daughter, the Comedian, Part II

MELISSA: Who's your favorite boy?
RUTH: DADDY!
RUTH: Then Larry.

MELISSA: Who's your favorite girl?
RUTH: DORA!!!!!
MELISSA: What about me?
RUTH:... Mommy?

My Daughter, the Comedian

Just some stuff that I wanted to record from the past couple of months, but no photos...

[We're listening to this song]
TMBG: Yodeling like cowhands do! Yodeleihoo!
RUTH: That's silly! Cows don't have hands!

[I throw a piece of gum off the porch, grumbling about kids throwing stuff there.]
RUTH: Daddy! You don't throw trash in the street! You know better! You know where is the garbage!
ME: You're right, I shouldn't have thrown it in the street.
RUTH: You have to go time out.
[Trying to show her that rules are rules, when we get inside I dutifully sit in the time out chair. Normally, for her, we set the kitchen timer to 2 minutes for time outs. I sit for a bit.]
RUTH: Beep! Time out is over.

[We've been talking about Spain and pretending to go there, like we're in a Dora episode, but an actually educational one - go to the airport, over the Atlantic Ocean, etc. Ruth pulls her "phone" out of her backpack."
RUTH: Spain? Are you open? I called them. They're open.